My kids happiness or my happiness?

I have two kids with him!rightnow he is in jail and I have not talked to him or visit him! I had kicked him out before he went to jail,we been together nine years but have been through everything you can think of! I feel happier,relaxed,and at peace without him,yet sometimes I remember all our good times and I want him back not to mention I would go crazy of just the tought of him being with someone else! he is not a good husband but he is the perfect dad : /what to do?